It's Called Courtesy...

Even if you can't spell it, you should use it.

Last night I had the priviledge of being my friends +1 to the Dandy Warhols. It totally took me back to high school and they played mostly older stuff so we were stoked! I was bummed today though when I couldn't find their CDs and realized they must be in the missing CD case that was sucked into some sort of abyss or the back of my closet.

The problem is, we are getting older. I don't just mean me, I mean everyone, all of us. We are all getting older. With age comes the list of complaints we have, especially regarding other people behaviour. Things are too loud or too quiet. You have to stand too long or sit too long. Everything is annoying. Unfortunately, we are correct in all of these assumptions. Case in point:

At the show last night, we were surrounded by a group of very young twenty-somethings. The couple to our left was, we assume, on their first date. They could not stop talking to each other the whole night! At one point, the guy turned to the girl and asked if he looked fat in his jeans. Seriously!? Who goes to a concert and chit chats? Do that in the back people! (mark it!) They were disrupting to everyone around us (except their equally dumb witted friends). Grr!!

This lead me to think about the rules of conduct when out in public, say at a concert or movie. Courtesy is not a 4-letter word!

1. If you are not interested in what you are seeing, step away. If you don't like the band, go outside, move to the back of the auditorium. Get out of the way of those who do like the band. If you're at the movies, feel free to leave. If you cannot, then sit quietly and wait for the pain that is your life to end. DO NOT engage in loud or distracting conversation.

1b. At the movies, it is not appropriate to continually turn to your partner and ask "What's going on?" We also don't need your play by play of what action is happening on screen. We can see it too. Maybe, if you shut your mouth and watched the movie instead of talking to your buddy, you would know what was going on. Just a thought, try it.

2. If you are at the movies, leave your phone in your purse or pocket. I'm serious. You can text your buddy where to meet you after the movie. It takes all my strength not to grab your phone from you and throw it at the screen.

3. Dancing is fun and encouraged at concerts. You may notice a whole group towards the front of the stage bouncing up and down. Perhaps there is a circle pit forming and you want to run your little heart out while pounding into other music fans. Bravo! However, flailing your arms akimbo with no regard for those around you is not dancing, it's assault. This includes but is not limited to: feet, legs, arms, hands, and stinky dreadlocks. Please keep these inside the ride at all times.

4. A note to the exceedingly tall: Move it! Everyone likes to be up close and see the band, however you are blocking over a dozen eyes with your gangly form. Move to the side or the back and enjoy looking over all of our heads as we struggle to see around the person in front of us.

5. Be aware of your surroundings. This is a good one for general life use as well. I know you can see me. I've been standing behind you for over half an hour. Do you think I'm a spectre? Then why do you insist of walking right towards me like you plan to pass through my shoulder? There's a foot and a half gap on the other side of me. Head that way fool!

What else annoys the crap out of you when you're at a concert or the movies.

The New (Old) Rules of Dating

So, last nights first date went off well even though I may have had one too many gin & tonics, but we'll get to that in a second. There are a few things about dating that stick out in my mind, most of them learned from my father. His dating life began in the mid-60s and the lessons and manners he acquired there were passed on to me. Not a lot, I mean, who wants to talk to their Dad about boys, but enough. In many ways, it's the essence of a "Mad Men" kind of existence. Maybe that's why I've always been fascinated with that period.

1) Guy's usually ask girls- This is not to say the reverse (or some version thereof) isn't true, but it's the exciting exception not the rule. My father's take is that women want a strong man who can make decisions and isn't afraid of rejection. I kinda agree.

2) Dates should be made several days in advance & confirmed- If a guy does this, I'm impressed. It sounds so simple and obvious, but we (ladies) have all been asked out for the following day or worse, the day of. My date was made on Monday for Thursday. He called on Tuesday to confirm I wasn't "just being nice" (I explained that I am never nice for the niceness sake. See #4), then again Thursday afternoon to finalize. Preparation is key, so is the implied respect for your "busy" schedule.

3) Whoever asks, pays- It is important thought to always have $20 or a good credit card in case he turns into a loser or decides to go dutch. Again, be prepared.

4) Self-deprecation is a turn off for everyone- Seriously. This includes but is not limited to: "I can't believe you agreed to go out with me." "I never thought you would say yes." "I know I'm not your type..." Stay away from the Debbie Downer shit too- no one wants to hear about how your cat died, or you hate your job, or just got out of the hospital after your "little accident". Save it for later.

5) Don't drink too much/get drunk- This one didn't come from my Dad in those words, I take it from his traditional good bye of "keep your wits about you and watch your six", but I think the sentiment works perfectly here. Patti Stanger has it right with this one! Drinking too much can lead to anything from kissing someone you shouldn't (or worse!) to puking in the restaurant bathroom- Not that I've done either of those things... It can also inhibit your ability to self-edit or remember what a great or horrible time you had. I'm pretty bad at this one as I tend to have a few cocktails when I'm nervous, but at least I don't have a "calming dose" before the date anymore- that always led to trouble!

That's pretty much it. Obviously, don't be a douche (that goes for everyone) and make sure you listen and don't just talk. All of these rules should guarantee a second date if it's wanted.

What rules/advice do you have??