Saturday Free for All!

* I got nothing today, but felt bad about not posting so much this week. I'm getting sick again and I totally blame AMC theatres and "Robin Hood". I felt fine until I went to the advanced screening, now I'm coughing again and feel like I have a fever even though I don't. It makes it so much worse that I'm stuck, alone, at work. I just want to go to sleep. But instead, I have 4.5 hours left of work before I go to the grocery to get more cold medicine and figure out what I'm making for WWQTW on Monday. (I can't wait to tell you all about it. We are watching what may arguably be my favorite movie- no pressure).

* I think the office is haunted. I keep hearing the back door open and someone typing upstairs, but there's no one there. It's freaking me out! Be gone demon! Step into the light children, all are welcome!

* Watch out pro-choice'ers: A pro-lifer by the name of Marjorie Dannenfelser is clambering to oust Senate majority leader Harry Reid (D-Nevada). She founded and heads the Susan B. Anthony List which is hoping to put representatives in Congress who are pro-life and anti-choice concerning abortions. Read more about her here. (Special thanks to Femme Writes for the heads up).

* So, I'm trying to get ready for work this morning (not an easy task), and I keep seeing movement outside in my courtyard. I think nothing of it, but there's an accompanying noise that startles my cat. I peek outside and find a DirecTV guy waking away at my tree and messing with my dish. Unfortunately, I was running late for work so I just bolted out the door without speaking to him. Who called him? Was he supposed to fix my neighbors dish and got mine instead/as well? I'll tell you, if my TV starts working I will continue to pay the ridiculous bill I get for basic cable at least 1 more month. Otherwise, I'm going to kick them in the shins and demand restitution. I understand that if there's severe weather my dish might stop working, but what's the excuse for now signal yesterday when there was only a light drizzle? Or for the past week?

* Do you watch "The Vampire Diaries"? Did you watch the season finale? WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! This is why this show is one of the best things on TV (Ian Somerhalder isn't too bad himself). Put it in your queue ASAP. It's what "Twilight" could have been- sexy, mysterious, dangerous, sexy.

* If the fire alarm at work doesn't stop going off, I'm going to stab myself or it. Whichever seems easier at the time.

* My Vegan Chocolate Chip recipe is posted on Veggie Sometimes. Check it out, they're delicious!

* Today's word of the day is: disappointed. See also: ill

Women's Writes: Repo Women

On the 5th of every month, bloggers from around the world are open to write about rights and issues concerning women. First started by Shine and Marie , we're hoping to bring a variety of women's issues to the forefront to make people aware of what's going on. For the month of May, we've chosen to write about Women's Reproductive Rights and Issues. Please join us in telling us your stories, thoughts, and ideas on a monthly basis. To read the first installment, click here.



I had nothing planned for this instalment of Women's Writes, but after reading many amazing blogs from some hilarious and strong women I decided I needed to come up with something. I'm nothing if not easily influenced (/sarc).

I think part of my problem with coming up with something to write about is I'm a bit out of the loop as far as women's reproduction goes. No, no, I know about my lady bits; I just don't have much use for them. I haven't had a serious boyfriend in years (*sigh*) and what action I do get is limited to one-off affairs. I've never needed the services of Planned Parenthood or a gyno (I heart my Internist!). I'm not a very good woman (but you knew that).

Like a crash of lightening, I thought of the perfect topic for this blog while writing this blog- crazy. Here's what bothers me: Woman's medical services are often not covered by insurance. I've been pretty lucky and my yearly visits and tests have always been covered. My co-pay on birth control (should I ever need it- cross fingers) is treated like any other medication. I can see any specialist I like. This, however, is not always the case and is losing favor at alarming speeds. Many insurance companies don't cover a woman's basic reproductive health panel. Many don't cover birth control (though rest assured Viagra is covered!). Many don't cover mammograms until you hit your 50s. Did you know pregnancy is a pre-existing condition? Uh, hello! What the frak?


I'm not saying this is some sort of conspiracy set up by pro-life advocates, simply that we are still second class citizens where our own health is concerned. Think about the number of woman who are diagnosed with breast cancer early because they had access to mammograms? How many lives would be saved? How many unwanted pregnancies and children put into the state's care if every woman could get access to basic birth control. I'm sure it's cheaper than caring for the over 581,000 children in the foster care system. How many other cancers, tumors, cysts, and other reproductive issues would be caught and fixed if women could get a pap smear?

Thank god I don't plan on having any children, because my current insurance doesn't provide for maternity leave. They call it "short term disability". So, giving birth and bonding with my baby in it's first few months is a disability? Do you know how long you have to pay for STD before you get even 3 months off? You basically have to start now or before you plan to get pregnant. Heaven help the woman who gets pregnant accidentally.

Why is men's health covered and ours isn't?

Hero Worship

She doesn't know I'm doing this and I hope she'll forgive me the liberty, but I want to talk to you about one of my hero's- my sister.

In the movie of her life, she would be played by Liv Tyler- she's beautiful both inside and out, and she's wicked smart. Because of, or in spit of, our being "Irish twins" we are best friends. I can talk to her about anything and vice versa. I know that she'll give it to me straight and I'm never one to sugar coat my opinions on what she might have done wrong (or right for that matter).

I've spoken about her before on these pages, but I feel further exploration is needed. As long time readers know, she is vegetarian and has been for many years. This has not always been easy in our household, but I think recent family events have helped turn our parents on to her train of thought. She is currently studying to be a veterinarian and is a leader in her class. I couldn't be more proud!

On a daily basis, she overcomes diversity. As a democrat in the land of republicans and an atheist in god's country; she is constantly trying to defend her point of view while offending as few people as possible. Her personal and political views make her easy cannon fodder for those around her, for those who call her "friend". Amidst all of this, she maintains a brave face. It is more important to her that she represents the subcultural groups she defines in a positive light than to stir the pot. Whether she thinks of it this way or not, her dream is to open the eyes of those around her to be more understanding and tolerant.

"I want for them, if they meet another vegetarian, [etc.] to say, 'I knew a vegetarian in college and she was cool, maybe this person will be cool too'".

It's hard for my city mind to understand that for many who know her, she is the first vegetarian they've ever meet, the first democrat, the first not to go to church even on a holiday basis. She puts her own feelings and discomfort on the back burner everyday in hopes of building and bridging ties within her community.

Growing up in a diverse metropolitan community and to a family of liberals, we were exposed to all sorts of things others can only imagine. We've traveled the country (heck- I know people who have never left the state), left the country to travel, been to museums and musicals, plays and operas. We've talked with people of all socio- and economic persuasions. We are renaissance ladies and proud of it!

My sister is my hero because I take all of these things for granted. I live in a city that puts republican, democrat, liberal, and green party candidates on the ballot. I can eat delicacies from Ethiopia to Italy. I can go to church, synagogue, mosque, or stay home. I am surrounded by amazing friends who may judge me or poke fun at my choices, what they see as my idiosyncrasies, yet they love and respect me just the same. To be reminded that this is not happening all over the country hurts my heart. When will the prejudices and naive hatred for those that are different from ourselves end? When will we all learn to respect those who give us respect, to think about others feelings? When will we, as a country, grow up and out of the past? Who cares if someone is vegetarian or vegan or 100% carnivore (seriously, I worry about those of you who refuse to eat any vegetable. PS- Potatoes are not a vegetable)? If someone is Catholic, or Baptist, or Jewish, or Muslim, or atheist, or if they worship at the shrine of the almighty "boob tube"? How does that effect you? How does that harm you?

In an effort to help my sister, I did some digging into her college town, trying to find vegetarian restaurants or groups she could join. There weren't any. I understand that she goes to an agricultural school, but how can there not be at least ONE vegetarian club? When I asked Urban Spoon for a recommendation, it listed one vegetarian restaurant- a sandwich place. Uh, I think we can do better. On another search, I came up with a better option, The Village Cafe/Art979, which has mostly vegetarian options and is completely local. Yea! Now if only we can get a few more cool places down there...

I also came across a blog from Fair & Feminist entitled: "Is Vegetarian a dirty word in Texas?" I would say it is. In the same spirit as yesterday's Women's Writes assignment, I further call you all to action. Be respectful of those around you. If you can't do that for a friend, who can you? Try to learn something new everyday. If you know someone with a varying point of view, ask them about it! Be respectful and listen. Try to see it from their side. Share your own feelings. Remember, and this may be most important of all, that they have feelings too. If what you want to say would hurt your feelings, why would you say it to someone else? We can never get along and end discrimination and hate until we learn to listen to one another and accept our differences.

[side note: Have you heard the story about Constance McMillan, the teenager from Mississippi who was barred from attending her high school prom with her girlfriend? It went to court and the judge ruled that the school was incorrect, but stopped short of saying they still had to throw a dance. Instead, parents and community members offered to throw one, which was then cancelled. Constance was invited to another prom that was being thrown instead. When she got there, there were only 5 other people there and some chaperone's from the school. It turns out, the original prom was not cancelled and she was sent to a "reject prom". Adding insult to injury, a Facebook page teasing and ridiculing her was created by her classmates. This sickens me. Please join me in signing The Human Rights Campaign's petition to the local school board stating our outrage that this was allowed to go on and seemingly sanctioned by them. You can read more about what happened by visiting The Bloggess' website (where I learned of this latest development) here. Thanks in advance!]

Women's Writes- When the Past meets the Present

I was 13 or 14. It was summer and my best friend and I were walking down the street towards her house. One of our favorite things to do was walk to Chinatown, a 3 block radius in the suburbs with amazing food stores and restaurants. We would order egg drop soup and egg rolls; then paint ceramic bunnies at the pottery store around the corner. It was warm, and the laughter from children playing at the elementary pool as we passed it was infectious.

A car raced up the street towards us, slowing down just long enough for one of its passengers to throw a Slurpee out the window, hitting both of us. While they laughed and attempted a U-turn to get away, one of the men yelled out the car window:

"Nigger!"

We stood there in stunned silence watching the cold drink drip off our hair and hit the pavement, listening to children playing and laughing nearby. I looked at my friend and saw something I had never seen before in her eyes: apathy.

The two men turned the boulevard and ran their car into a fire hydrant on the corner. We just stood there. That was her street, we were on our way to her house to digest and play video games (remember the Sony channel?). I grabbed her arm and said, "Let's go". We walked the two blocks to my house and as I opened the front door, my father came out from the kitchen eager to hear about my day. Instead, what he saw were two sad, wet, children. I think I was crying when he grabbed a beach towel to dry me off and I told him what had happened. As soon as we were not sticky anymore, he loaded us into the car and drove to the scene of the incident.

The car was still there crashed into the hydrant except now it was joined by a police cruiser and several on-lookers. We pulled past the accident and parked, my father getting out of the car and telling us to "stay put". I watched him walk back towards the police officer. To this day, I have no idea what he said or what the outcome was. When he got back into the car, he said nothing; he just drove us two houses down to my friend's house.

I was old enough to understand what had happened that day, but young and naïve enough to be shocked by it. Sure, this is the south, but I live in a major metropolitan city! This doesn't happen here. My father said something that will haunt me forever. That no matter where I go or what I do, I will be seen a certain way- white, privileged, smart, attractive. My friend however, will struggle her whole life because she is black. It won't matter how smart she is, how pretty, how much money she makes; in some circles she will never be those things and there is nothing she can do about it. She will fight this fight all her life.

I was so angry when he told me this. He's a fool! The world is different! But, the truth is he was right and it made me angry.

My Utopia, my "1984", my "Brave New World", is a world without "-ism's": where little girls can walk down the street without being assaulted; where someone hates you not for the color of your skin, or gender, or sexual orientation; but because they don't like your personality. I've worked my whole life to break down stereotypes. I don't allow that kind of talk from friends nor do I condone the racist jokes I've heard. Around me, that is unacceptable behavior- Make it a habit and you're out.

The purpose of Women Write's was to talk about something that affects women and while I'm sure I've lived up to the spirit of the assignment, I may have taken some pretty big liberties. While speaking with shine yesterday this story is what kept popping into my mind. The end of "-ism's" means an end to all of them- from racism to feminism to capitalism to communism. It means an end to hate, an end to separatism (there's another –ism!). It means equality. Whether you are a woman, man, child, cow, monkey, whatever; you can benefit from the notions of equality. Perhaps you already feel and act that way, perhaps it's something you struggle with everyday, perhaps you have no idea what I'm saying. But, I hope now you will stop to think next time you make a joke, or put someone down, or judge a book by its cover and stop- how would I like it?

Oh Politicians, How You Vex Me

Get your letter writing supplies out- I am ready!

A headline caught my eye on my Yahoo homepage: "A Policy Change on Abortion, But How Radical?" Of course, I was curious. Many of you read shine's blog about the current proposal to Utah state law regarding abortion, and I know it stirred up quite a bit of emotion on both sides. Personally I am so proud of her and what she wrote- she's got a lot of balls! I am prepared that this blog may do the same. Hence, get your letter writing campaign hat on.

The article talks about the President's new health care bill and how it relates to current law on abortion funding. I have to tell you, I felt a bit in the dark. Having never to need the service so far, my thoughts on payment were misguided at best. I didn't realize it was covered at all on insurance. I thought it was always out of pocket. I'm actually surprised to hear that "abortion coverage is now widely available through workplace health plans". Really? I don't remember seeing anything about it on ANY of the insurance documents I've filled out. Hell, many of them don't even cover basic gynecological/pregnancy care (don't get me started on that one). How much does it cost? Over the long term, is it cheaper than paying straight out only when you need the service? Would it benefit a person who has never needed the service but is scared to death that one day she might? Is this all in the fine print that we never read when signing up for employer based health care coverage? I'm a bit pleased to hear this is an option for some women, I just wish it were available to more.

The main focus of the article is how the proposed bill would differ from current law and what is getting both Republican and Democratic panties in a twist. A quick break down:
Current law states that federal funding can only be used towards abortion if the procedure is required due to rape, incest, or to protect the health of the mother (Hyde Amendment). The tricky part lies in the difference between the House and Senate bills. One requires the policy holder to purchase separate abortion coverage while the other simple requires them to write a separate check for the abortion coverage they receive. I have to tell you, these both sound about the same to me and the article doesn't do a good job at differentiating why one is better than the other. They're basing all of this (the bill) on the governments own plan for it's workers (which may not contain abortion coverage except where allowed by Hyde). So, is something stopping these employees from purchasing a separate policy? Do they get fired? Lose their coverage? I'm a bit confused.

To me, either one sounds nice. Coverage available if wanted and you can opt out if you don't. What's the big deal? Oh yea, women's bodies and the government's vain attempt to control what we do with them. I think this is why politics leads me to drinking. Why does anyone care what anyone else does? You don't like abortion? Don't get one! [side note: I am in no way implying that someone somewhere likes abortion. I simply wanted to separate the two sides in as simple a language as I could.] Then chose the insurance coverage that doesn't include abortion. Are you concerned you may need an abortion in the future? Get the coverage that covers it! Simple! Now, can we all go on about our lives?

I've been openly pro-choice since the 5th grade when we had a mock presidential debate. I played Bill Clinton. You can imagine how unpopular that made me in Texas (even with my adolescent peers!). This is a position in which I am unwavering, yet I respect the decision others make to be pro-life. It upsets me when they cannot do the same. The decision to have an abortion must be a painful and labored one. Just thinking about what I would do causes me strife and I'm thankful I've never been in that position. I know I can't have a baby now- I'm still a baby and can barely take care of myself. Plus, I would be a horrid mother. I'm very selfish and care for little but how everything effects me. I'm in my 20's and I make no apologies for it. Yes, I am happy for my friends who have kids. Most are married and have good jobs and family support. I only have one of those things.

So I guess what I'm saying is can't we all go back to a more selfish nature and time and worry about ourselves not our neighbor? (In this matter at least).