Sunday, January 3, 2010

You Can Twitter If You're Lonely

Hello Sunday, you started out rough, got a bit better, then finished off with a big dose of crazy. I am over self-entitled people who think I should care about everything they have to say. Repeating your statement doesn't change my answer to it, nor does it change your statement. I will continue with my, "Please speak to my boss about that line" until the cows come home. You will not win. Leave me alone. But, enough about my crazy day; it's Sunday, a time for lists and hilarity!! Or, at least lists.

I set out to re-publish some of my favorite tweets from the past year. I though this would be a simple task. Certainly, there is a button for me to push that would show every original tweet I wrote. There isn't and I spend 2 days going through them all. Clearly, if I plan to do this again next year, I'll need to start a running tab.

*What the frak is "My Giant Head" & what is #tlc trying to tell us? 1/2/10

*It is too cold inside to be considered "inside" 12/26/09

*Must wash dishes so I can make Christmas Cake balls for tomorrow... wait... that sounded dirty 12/24/09

*Party balloons are the beach balls of winter 12/17/09

*I wanna have your babies, and by babies, I mean let's get a dog 12/13/09

*Dear Joggers- just because you're in a race doesn't mean you should race towards my moving car. I will hit you. That is all 12/13/09

*Why is Christina Aguilera preaching to me about DirectTV? Does she need me to set up her DVR?? 12/8/09

*Wonder if I tagged all my blog posts with "twilight", I'd get more hits. Experiment to commence in 3...2... 12/3/09

*so...sleepy...check for...gas leak... 11/5/09

*I was already smitten, but then John Cusack just said "abattoir" and I fell in love 10/30/09

*Love that for some reason Vikings is in the top trending topics. I keep imagining the Nordic, but I guess they mean football 10/25/09

*sad how sore I am, thanks Nola! You could have at least bought me dinner first! 10/29/09

*I'm pretty sure there's a pterodactyl outside my window 10/2/09

*If you don't know how to operate a door, you should just kill yourself now 8/29/09

*I just inhaled a piece of kleenex! It's like a lame low-budget horror movie 8/14/09

*Eating healthy food is driving me crazy. I actually dreamed I drank a coke & it was the best dream I'd had in weeks. Sad. 8/14/09

*I already don't want to go to work tomorrow. I'd call out, but I think they're buying us lunch. 7/30/09

*Why does @david_lynch have his own coffee? Do you open each canister and get a surprise? like a playing card or severed toe? 7/23/09

*How do you do tattooed guy w/eye patch walking down my street. Argh!! 7/22/09

*Remember Jason & the Argonauts? Those fighting skeletons? That's me, 3rd from the left 6/27/09

*What does one wear to gay bingo if you are neither gay nor enjoy bingo?? 6/20/09

*My left eye is trying to mutiny. I'm no good in a standoff 5/10/09

*left eye has joined forces with my stomach to make me slowly go crazy. I fear the mutiny will be successful 5/10/09

*The heavens opened and attempted to murder us all. Thankfully, only my pant hems suffered 5/2/09


  1. So you didn't just go to your own page on Twitter and look at all your tweets? Please tell me that's what you did...

  2. If you're saying there's an easier way, I don't want to hear it. It took forever!!!

  3. Sadly, most "giant head" TV shows are about my family.