Friday, February 12, 2010

Winter Greetings from Murderville

It was quite eventful in Murderville last night. For the 1st time ever (knock wood) I didn't lose power! It seems I'm always in the group that loses power when there's a big storm, but last night I was spared. Praise Allah! Unfortunately, others were not so lucky. My partner in crime and word of the day president Jen, lost power from 9-1230; missing many important TV shows. Another friend watched as a transformer blew in front of her house, catching the surrounding trees on fire. (!) Thankfully, the firemen came and power was only lost for an hour. Another friend lost power yesterday from 12-5 and again from 10-still out. He did build a 9 ft tall snowman, so at least the day was not wasted.

It occurred to me (and I may be a late bloomer here) that I/we are lucky to live in or near a posh neighborhood. Sure, Murderville is low rent, but down the same street are million dollar McMansions. When the power does go out, it's usually back on within the hour. Where Jen lives, she's surrounded by large homes and adorable craftsman's. Lauren lives in the land of fancy condos. The case is driven home by pointing out my friend who is still without power lives in an older, middle to lower-middle class neighborhood. Moral of the story- Beverly Hills may have some slums, but it's still Beverly Hills.
I also suffered flashback's last night. Again, strange noises were heard in my courtyard. I carefully peered out the blinds and saw nothing. First thing first, I checked the gate (really, I have got to tell the gate story at some point, it really is spectacularly crazy); then went back to watching TV. The noise happened again, and this time I could see were it was coming from. There was a lady running around the courtyard wearing a motorcycle helmet. Out of view, I could see flashes from a camera. Hilarious! I also realized I'm getting old.
"Oh, how fun! I'm super jealous. I wish I knew them so I could go outside and run around."
"God, it's been like 5 minutes. Why won't they shut up? It can't still be fun!"
"I hope they get frost bite!"
[side note: At some point my satanic upstairs joined in the fun which was a relief from the constant noise I usually hear. Until that is, they came back inside stomping around and chasing their evil dog. Didn't you get enough of that outside?? Come on!]

It is incredibly boring and sad to be at work today. It is a lovely 36 outside, the snow is starting to melt, I can drive anywhere I want (except Whole Foods because they don't have power), and everyone else I know is home drinking champagne and watching Netflix.

You would think this boredom would lead to something creative, but alas, no. I've spent my day at work photocopying recipes, reading, watching "Law & Order" on the L&O channel, and eating pizza.
[side note: Big shout out to Domino's for being open for delivery!!! I officially heart you more than Papa John's who couldn't drive the block and a half to the office w/my Tuscan cheese pizza. And, you were cheaper. Kudos!]

I was very excited to learn that Direct TV works in snow as long as you sweep the dish every 2-3 hours. 12.5 inches of snow? No problem! Why can't it work like that in heavy rain? Losers. I did miss the end of "Grey's Anatomy" (and no, I will not apologize for watching! Those who stuck with it last season have been rewarded w/a plum of a season this year). Next stop, watching it online; perhaps today.

Oh!! One of our resident's just brought us cupcakes! Ohhhh, red velvet w/butter creme icing. Delish. Gotta remember to send a thank you card...

(Okay, that was random and it's not even Saturday)

While trying to leave my house and get to work today (please send me your sympathy), I saw this:

Uh... Excuse me, Douche? Why/How did you think it was acceptable to park your car in the middle of the road? Forget about turning left when you enter my driveway. Re-purposed cop car is in the middle of the "T". You couldn't get closer to the dumpster? If I didn't like my car, I would have run into you on purpose, then leave a note explaining how you deserved it. Problem is, you probably can't read. I hope you want to be famous, because I'm posting this with the word "douche" stamped on it in the laundry room. Oh, and on Facebook and Twitter. I already had to move a tree (!) just to get to my car, I don't need to put up with you as well, Asshole.


  1. Oh, murderville... vaguely reminiscient of my nice-ish neighborhood adjacent locale. I am so sad I missed all the snow drama. But your retellings make me feel like I was kinda sorta here...Shelly by the way. I joined as a follower (not in a creepy way) but it doesn't recognize me.

  2. Shelly, you totally crack me up!! You can follow me in a creepy way anytime!